My goodbye - I will miss you!

in steemexclusive •  9 months ago 

WhatsApp Image 2021-10-31 at 6.53.39 PM.jpeg

Very few of you already know it, other followers may suspect that something is wrong because of my lack of activity those days: I'm in a very dark place right now. I'm in a place where I haven't been before, and it means something, considering that I was treated for depression twice in my life and experienced plenty of unpleasant situations. I am dealing with loss, which gives me sleep deprivation, disturbs the appetite process and obviously has a negative impact on my intellectual skills. As Steemit is based on intellectual work, I'm unable to remain active on the platform.

I'm a zombie - alive and dead at the same time. I'm waiting for the better moments, knowing that time heals most of the wounds, but also knowing that every serious wound leaves scars that will remain with me for the rest of my life. I'm mechanically following the procedures to not lie down in the bed for a few months as it happened before in my life. I can't allow it - every time the depression comes back, stronger medicine is needed to defeat it. I'm not in the bed, but not sure if there is any difference in how I felt then and now, I'm not sure how being able to stand up can be better if I don't feel anything anymore.

Sorry, my cuties, but I'm leaving. I hope my presence here had some positive impact. I hope you learned something from my permaculture lessons or other publications that I have always been trying to make as educative as possible, I hope that, by getting the chance to know the gay and polyamorous guy, like me, you have opened bit your minds (I know in many countries saying loudly "I'm gay" is basically prohibited by law, so you didn't get the chance to hear it from your friends even though, believe me, some of them are queer as well), finally I hope all my lists of active communities or tips how to use steemit helped you a bit in better understanding the platform.

I'll start powering down soon and will keep the money in USDT taking out only as much as it will be needed for me to self-care in those difficult times/treat the disease if medicines will be needed. When I'll get better, I'll probably transfer back the rest of the resources to Steemit and will try to write here again. It won't be a matter of weeks though, but rather months.

I don't want my leaving to have any negative impact on the platform so I made sure everything that I have created or participated in, will continue:

  • Steem Travelers DOES NOT power down. The money I have earned in the community account is my gift to Steemit, my contribution to the further development of the platform. The community remains untouched and will be managed by @willeusz.
  • I am powering down ac-cheetah (I invested some money in that account and want to take it back), but the downvote trail remains active. After powering down, the keys to ac-cheetah will be given to the @endingplagiarism team so they can use it as they want. While the power down is proceeding, I'll continue downvoting abusers as I'm doing for months (just in February, we forced three orca abusers to leave the platform).
  • the Steemcurator06 team will be guided by @haidermehdi now. I am not upvoting any other posts, but the team is made by such great and talented people that it would be a pity to punish them for my leaving. I hope the change of the leader will be accepted by @steemcurator01

Thank you to all the wonderful people that I have met here. To @udyliciouz @willeusz and @ponpase for helping with Steem Travelers, to @graceleon @benson6 @ngoenyi @the-gorilla @daytona475 for chats, help, friendship, to @o1eh, @haidermehdi @progressivechef @esteban85 @ponpase and @willeusz for working together in the SC06 team, to @adeljose @marycybetancourt @xpilar and others for helping with Steemit Weekly months ago, for @alejos7ven and @symbionts for launching the downvote trail for me, for @rme and steemcurator team for believing in me, supporting my posts and helping with my projects and for many more that I did not mention. I love you all!

Steemit, as the platform, may have its ups and downs, may seem sometimes unfair, but all those things do not matter as much as being part of a community made of such wonderful people. Thank you once again, that I was able to be a part of it and that I could call Steemit my home for nearly the whole year.

Authors get paid when people like you upvote their post.
If you enjoyed what you read here, create your account today and start earning FREE STEEM!
Sort Order:  

So about this difficult time you are facing, I feel so sad to hear that I won't be working with you for sometime. I wish you quick recovery. I will be so happy to start working with you soon.
I will miss you badly dear friend.

I don't know what to tell you friend, I think I get a little sad every time someone leaves, and I know they are free to do so.
I know that someone like you will come back, because you love to write, you like to share...
I send you a hug and I want to tell you that just as one day I told you "welcome", now with great affection I tell you: see you soon, my dear... it was a pleasure to meet you.

Take care of yourself.

see you soon! Thank you for everything! <3

🤗🌼

Hello, dear friend! I am extremely sorry to hear such news. I remember you from your book reviews, what great posts you used to make! I gladly accepted the news about creating a travel community and then I was so sad...

I hope for your speedy recovery and return to the Steemit, if that's possible! Sending you rays of goodwill and good cheer!

Thank you very much, I truly appreciate your kind words! <3

May I ask you to vote for the last witnesses? If it doesn't bother you, then please go to the page and select accounts:

@alexmove.witness
@steemit-market

We will be very pleased with your attention :)

Sorry to hear of the difficult times you are facing.

Hope Steem will see you again when you are in a better place.

Thank you for your contributions to the platform.

Truly, I hope so as well and I do hope it will be very soon. Thank you for everything!

I love the great leader you are sir you are indeed good for the position you occupied your words of encouragement bring peace to the suffering one and to difficult situations indeed your the best greater.

Semoga jasa-jasa senior kita ini tidak pernah terlupakan, saya selaku pemula dalam platform ini sangat mengidolakan dia😇

And I'm not saying goodbye, I'm sure you'll be back. I hope I will still be in Steemit and we will work on something new.

I'm wishing myself that and the beer drunk together in Ukrainian Lviv or Kyiv when I'll be in Europe next time!

Steemit will miss you. Your contribution was significant. Over time, you will miss Steemit.

I wish you to overcome all difficulties as soon as possible and I very much hope that your wish for beer in Ukrainian Lviv or Kyiv will come true.

Goodbye.

La depresión es un mal silencioso y traicionero, no hay peor lucha que la de uno mismo contra la mente, no hay persona que pueda decir que te entiende porque lo que sientes es único y diferente a cualquier otro sentimiento, aun así entristece que personas tan talentosas, llenas de vida e inteligentes como tu se vean afectadas de esta manera y no puedo decirte mas que deseo tu pronto recuperación, como se lo digo a @willeusz te lo digo a ti: ustedes en poco tiempo lograron muchas cosas buenas y eso es merito por la excelencia. Saludos y que logres conseguir paz mental para aliviar tus malestares. HASTA PRONTO!!!!!!

¡muchas, muchas gracias!

It has always been an amazing experience working with you. First the newspaper, then other contests and now the curators team..

I wish you a speedy recovery. Hope you'll be back stronger! Good luck❤️

Thank you so much. Good luck on Steemit! I believe we will be able to work together not once, not twice in the future

Man, you'll be missed here. In the short time I've been following you, I can say that you're one of the steemit users I admire the most. I loved every post of yours, and I also learnt a lot from you (I still keep some of your useful links).
Oh, man! I hope you can overcome your problem anytime soon (I've been there, bro. I know it can be hard), and come back with us.

Wishing you the best ♥

Thank you. It's tough, but I believe that disconnecting and giving myself more self-attention + therapy and proper treatment will help me to recover soon. Good luck! <3

Good luck for you as well 😊

What unfortunate news dear friend. I hope everything gets better, despite having shared very little I greatly regret your departure from steemit.

I can only wish you many blessings and that everything improves for you, you are greatly appreciated. ❤️

Thank you very much, Rafael!

I sincerely hope that this goodbye is a see you soon and we can have you back on Steemit reading your valuable content for this ecosystem. Greetings friend a big hug.

You are much appreciated ❤️

Hola @papi.mati que triste noticia 😔 espero te recuperes pronto y puedas estar sano totalmente.

Valoro tus aportes a Steemit!

Te dire Hasta Luego!

Muchissimas gracias y... hasta luego!

Compartimos realmente poco pero fue un honor hacerlo, el mejor de los deseos para ti y espero te recuperes, hasta pronto

Compartimos poco, pero este poco estaba muy importante para mi. Ayudaste a mi mucho en este plataforma y muchas gracias por eso! Hasta pronto!

I'm sorry to see you go. Keep safe!

Thank you!

By replying to our comments is admirable. It just shows the kind of person who is going to be missing from the platform. Godspeed!

Lamento esto que estaba viendo ahora, la verdad no sabía lo que estabas pasando y aún así estabas tan comprometido con la plataforma, eso es algo de admirar. Se que si dependiera de ti aun estarías aquí, pero las fuerzas son mayores y lo mejor ahora es que te recuperes y que regreses pronto con nuevas fuerzas y despuesto a seguir aportando tu gran trabajo aquí en steemit! Fuerza y Valor @papi.mati

Gracias. Me siento totalmente impotente desde hace 13 días. Traté de trabajar como administrador de la comunidad y sc06 en ese momento, pero incluso esas responsabilidades eran demasiado difíciles en este momento. Sería injusto quedarme y comprometer la calidad del trabajo, así que tuve que irme por ahora. Por ahora.

Bien dicho! Por ahora. Renuévame y porfavor regresa con más fuerzas. Saludos y estaré orando por ti junto con mi esposa.

Hi, papi! Well I never knew your real name!

It really is a pleasure to meet you, read you, and have interacted with you. Trust in God and with the support of your loved ones you are going to get out of this dark moment very soon and fast, so we can continue reading you and enjoying all the good things you have shared with us.

Your journey in Steemit has been very worthwhile, even 10 people could not replace you. Always with good ideas and best disposition for everything in benefit. Nothing compares to all the contribution you have generated through your publications, comments, ideas, and opinions from an accurate perspective.

God bless you, today, tomorrow and always. And I hope to be able to continue reading you soon.

Thank you for your kind words! I really hope that I'll be able to write again soon as well...

Of course my friend, people like you are always welcome. We really need more people like you here at steemit.

We have never interacted much but I have always admired your work and your contribution to Steemit.

This is a bad phase of your life. It will pass and as they say, Time is a big healer. I am sure it will heal you too.

Lots of prayers your way and already waiting for you to come back.

True, we didn't chat much, but I always considered you the core, heart of that platform. You are the quality on Steemit and I wish you all the best. Thank you for your comment and prayers!

Thank you for thinking so high of me.

I am sure everyone here including me think likewise of you. We'll all be waiting for you.

I wish you the best...!

If the best thing at the moment is to turn your back on Steemit, you must do that. If it has to do with turning your back on everything, it might be wrong. You could write about your conditions instead of permaculture - as you say: there will be many people who recognise themselves....

What I want to say is: whatever helps you right now should be totally okay!

Ich wünsche Dir das Beste...!

Wenn das Beste derzeit ist, Steemit den Rücken zu kehren, mußt Du das tun. Wenn es damit zu tun hat, allem den Rücken zu kehren, könnte es auch falsch sein. Du könntest über Deine Zustände schreiben, statt über Permakultur - wie Du sagst: es wird viele Leute geben, die sich wiedererkennen...

Was ich sagen will: was immer Dir gerade hilft, soll völlig okay sein!

I was thinking about it, but I'm afraid that I'm not able to focus enough to write about how do I feel and how do I deal with all that is happening right now. Maybe I'll do that at some point, before I will recover completely, but when I will be strong enough to write again.

One thing I know for sure: the chapter "Steemit" did not finish for me yet. It's just that I am unable to see myself in it (as in many other things) right now, at this moment.

Thank you for your comforting words!

Hehe - You could use the Steem as the biggest support group ever ;-))

No: listen to yourself and do exactly what feels right. All the best!

Dear @papi.mati, That's sad to hear about your leaving but everything changes. We all just have to keep in mind that after darkness there comes light again. I wish you health, balance and harmony. Thank you for supporting me. This platform will miss you. You are not a usual person, even not knowing you closely I am absolutely sure in it. Please come back when everything is better for you. I believe in it.

Thank you so much Alena! Wishing you all the best, both on Steemit and in your personal life. I truly hope to come to one of your concerts someday!

Hi @papi.mati, the health both physical and mental is the most precious thing in our life, I hope you will take time for you out of the civilization in the nature and get re-charged. Hope you will get better soon.

Thank you very, very much. I appreciate it!

Que te recuperes! Acude siempre a especialistas que puedan ayudarte con esto, ojalá puedas volver en un futuro no muy lejano, dejaste contenidos muy buenos por aquí y es una pena que ahora tengas que marcharte.

Muchissimas gracias!

Hi! You come in sometimes and claim rewards. Maybe you even read something from time to time? May I ask if you are feeling better in the meantime? I wish you very much that you have found a way to build yourself up. Please come back more often when it fits into your day ;-))

Hi! Du schaust öfter herein und claimst Rewards. Vielleicht liest Du ja sogar manchmal etwas? Darf ich fragen, ob es Dir mittlerweile besser geht? Ich wünsche Dir sehr, daß Du einen Weg gefunden hast, Dich aufzubauen. Laß Dich bitte wieder öfter blicken, wenn es in Deinen Tag paßt ;-))

You know, I know it is not easy what you are going through, and you may feel misunderstood by your environment... Depression is not a game and you know it since you have already come out of it twice YOU ARE STRONG! YOU CAN GO ON!

I recommend you to listen to ASMR music to help you sleep, try to eat or at least always drink liquids such as water and juices to keep you hydrated and your defenses high.

Another thing and the most important, GOD LOVES EVERY HUMAN BEING.... It doesn't matter if you are the gay guy as you define yourself, GOD HEAR US ALL.... Cry out to God from your thoughts, that is called Prayer, it is nothing more than talking to God IN SECRET.... HE HEARS YOU, HE GIVES YOU THE PEACE YOU NEED.

Jeremiah 33:3 Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and shew thee great and mighty things, and hidden things, which thou knowest not.

John 14:27 Peace I leave with you, my peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.

I send you a big hug and I hope you will recover very soon, from my heart my best wishes... DO NOT FORGET THAT YOU CAN WIN, YOU ARE THE OWNER OF YOUR ACTIONS... DO NOT LISTEN TO WHAT IS NOT YOURS.

Sorry for your case
Will see you

Sir I don't know you and have never come across any of your post but only with this one I can tell that you were a great writer I pray you sought out all your issues get relief as we awaits to welcome you back into the platform with your high intellectual writing I wish you good bye and I wait to welcome you back soon into the platform I love you sir and more grace as God is with you.

Friend, it has been a pleasure chatting with you. You are hardworking, you are sensitive and you are sincere. Those are qualities we don't find every day.

Receive my affectionate embrace. I hope to meet you sometime in real life.

@papi.mati you won my heart!

Your post is manually rewarded by the
World of Xpilar Community Curation Trail

STEEM AUTO OPERATED AND MAINTAINED BY XPILAR TEAM
https://steemit.com/~witnesses vote xpilar.witness

Take care of yourself and come back when you feel strong again

Hello @papi.mati:

Your departure from the platform has made me think, as you say, there are so many wonderful people here who feel so close even though we have never met.

On the other hand, if your departure is for your best good and you feel like coming back when you are better, that will make me very happy.

I hope that this time you can find the cause and origin of your depression and free yourself from it, because in the end life is simpler and more beautiful than we think.

Receive a hug from me, you left a beautiful mark on me, your publications, your sincerity and your way of contributing are qualities that I will always admire in you.

Take the time you need and free yourself from everything that hurts you, let go, but the solution is to have more desire to live, to love and to be in our lives.

  ·  9 months ago (edited)

It's sad to hear that you are going to leave Steemit, but that's good that you have to prioritize your health. We will be waiting for your come back...You are one of my best authors who also done great things here in this platform. We will surely miss you dear @papi.mati.😔

Do your best my friend, nice to meet you in Steemit platform. Steem On!

@papi.mati it is unfortunate to hear of this news, it is very sad for me to know that you are in that situation and that you are also leaving us for a while. I hope it will be a short time, and soon you will return with your renewed strength and good health. With me, you have a friend, if you need to vent you know you can count on me. I will miss you so much, please come back soon!! ❤

It is unfortunate that users like you, who have received good support from the Steemit team, are retiring, leaving a bad taste in the mouths of those who wish to build a good number of accounts with good voting power.

I hope you can solve your problems and get back to being part of the platform, and get your Steem Power up and running.

Steemit is and will continue to be great despite the ups and downs.

You are a leader who has always been friendly & helpful with team members.

We will miss you❤️

A veces las cosas se ponen oscuras, a veces simplemente todo se siente horrible, espero que puedas recuperarte, sinceramente espero que pueda ser incluso mañana. Espero que todo lo malo pronto pase lejos de ti. Fuerza y cuidate mucho.

Dear @papi.mati leader, I don't know why you want to leave this platform. Also, I have a few words to say, as soon as I join this Steemit platform, I take refuge in you and hope to work at Steemit. I have learned a lot from you. I have learned a lot of important information. So in no way can I accept your farewell.😢 I'm in a lot of trouble. However, your decision is up to you and I wish you prosperity in the future. Stay well wherever you are. I hope that after overcoming your problem you will come back to us again and take love dear leader.

I'm sad to hear that, I hope you can come back someday, I know I'm a new player, but I've known your account since the beginning of playing, introduced by my friend who has played for a long time. congrats to you i really appreciate you 😇

I feel your pain. In this week I was stopped by my wife at point number 99.
My depression is caused by financial stress and also the lack of some “luck”. They say you must trust and you must believe. After 4 to 5 years of badluck it gets “very hard” to have believe and the feeling of other forces in play keeps playing of in ones mind, trying to find ways to defeat them.
Sometimes it gets too much and you try to find reasons why this is happening and also reasons to keep on trying to fight.
I can’t say that I will pray for you because my prayers go unanswered. I will be thinking of you and hope you can overcome this stage in your life and get better soon.
@morpeussa

I hope you good health and hopefully you'll be able to recover from this bad phase of your life very soon. I know it must be very hard for you but I also know you'll jump back stronger.

Really sad news about this, I wish you rapid recovery and I am sure you will be back in top form and rock it again with us all.
Take care and if possible...hop over to Mauritius for some relaxing time which will be good for you!

Hey! Sabes que te quiero y mucho, me duele saber que sufres pero tengo fe de que saldrás de este mal momento.
Siempre estaré para ti, para ustedes, te mando un abrazo, si pudiera iría a visitarte y tomarnos el café que aún nos debemos.
Yo sigo orando por ti y por tu terruño,
Dios está al control!

Te extrañaré pero siento que volveremos a leerte 🙏❤️
Un abrazo grande Matteuz

I don't really know what problem you have, brother, why you have decided to leave this platform. I think you should think a few more times because I have never seen a user like you. I mean, every job has its ups and downs, so it's okay to give up. We should solve the problems and move forward. I believe you will work on the same platform as before and move forward together with us.

Believe me, that decision is not made spontaneously. I took two weeks to think about it before I decided to make this step. I just don't see another option for now.

Hola mi querido @papi.mati, MIS MEJORES DESEOS PARA TI... He viajado también en la plataforma y he estado enterada de ciertas cosas, incluso e hablado con especialistas y he podido ver más allá... Recuerda que después, de la tormenta siempre sale el sol...ARMATE DE VALOR YA... Cuidate mucho por favor, consulta un especialista, rodeate de energía positiva... No cometas locuras, sal de la oscuridad LA VIDA ES BELLA, brilla, brilla, brilla como sólo tu sabes hacerlo... Voy apoyar a @willeusz, él es EXCELENTE y tiene ojo clínico en el trabajo, eso es BUENO...

Gracias amiga por tus buenos deseos, acá estamos en la lucha! :)

Hi @papi.mati,
May Allah give you perfect health Aameen. We all love you and hope you will be soon at steemit. I can understand what happened when someone goes to depression. You will be soon just believe in yourself. Best wishes for your future. I really miss your great work

If I will say I am happy about this news, I am the biggest jerk of all time but at the same time this is related to life and health and your health is very important to me but if you need sometime to cool off and come back stronger, I am right by side @pi pi pi pi pi ti. It gonna be tough, rough and so cold outside I hope to have you back soonest. Stay safe and remain blessed tough guy.

It is with great pleasure to know you by chance. Hope that you can cope up with everything you are dealing with and be back soon to continue being an influencer. I will surely miss how you uplift me, support and encourage me. God bless.

🥺

[WhereIn Android] (http://www.wherein.io)

🥺

[WhereIn Android] (http://www.wherein.io)

I feel Soo sad that it took me three months to notice your absence

I left steemit early this year for different Reasons and when I came back there was something missing and I never could figure it out.

You were exceptionally on traveled community and an exceptional indivduals,

You may not know how many life's you tourched with your words or the magnitude of effect you had on me during my early steem days.

I so much looked up to you as a great writer and I am very luck have done so.

I wish you speedy recovery and soon I will welcome you with tales of all you missed.

Truely buts painful as more people leave

get well soon brother. see you around soon 🤗💗